http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g_qZ5B-yioU&ob=av2n

I was recently asked by a curious acolyte why I choose to tell all in my blog. Well, for starters, I'm very open about all facets of my life. My business relies heavily upon my online persona. This means every client I see now has read at least something about me. This said, I still try to keep my interactions as truthful and straight down the line as I can.

Therefore, I will never deny the existence of my children, or my lovers - why should I? Just as I am honest and proud about what I do for a living, I am also honest and proud about and to the people who populate my realm. They are my world! I refuse to keep the people I love in the dark about my life. If I truly love someone, I love them completely. I accept all facets of their identity - the good, the bad and the ugly.

 

Is it beyond comprehension to want the same in return?

 

Also, if I expect clients to treat me as an individual who is deserving of their respect and consideration, shouldn't I do the same by considering them worthy of my friendship if we 'click'? Yes, stalkers exist, and we should be aware of the risks.

It seems to me that everyone who has been involved in this industry in some capacity has a horror story to share around the forum campfire. Let's face it - not everyone is a whack job, or has evil ulterior motives. It's insulting to treat everyone as the enemy in response to a perceived threat, whether real or imagined.

It's also easy to understand why more and more people in today's society are being treated for conditions like depression, and complain of feeling alienated and distant from others. For a start, It's hard to bond with people who are too paranoid and suspicious to take a chance. Just imagine being socially inept. The situation would seem insurmountable!

I have a girlfriend who works in a bank call centre. She talks to dozens of people every day in the course of her working day. Now, should she exclude everyone from her personal life who uses phone banking, based solely on the possibility that such an individual might be a potential stalker? Isn't that like excluding someone who is known to frequent pubs and clubs on the basis that they be could be a potential alcoholic?!

Without evidence, you shouldn't make judgement calls about people. Judging someone on what they choose to share with others is the same as judging people based upon what they do for a living. It's the ultimate act of small mindedness and ignorance.

Even so, I still consider myself no different to any other trades person. Why should I? I provide a legal, commercial service. To me, the conversations I have with my clients are pretty much like the 'watercooler' talk other people share with their hairdresser, beautician, bar person, plumber, etc. Why would I censor such banter with clients, simply because my interaction with them that day happened to be of the client-hooker persuasion.

In any case, trying to fabricate/ maintain some bullshit fantasy requires energy I'm not prepared to invest. From what I've seen, the more elaborate the story, the more detail you have to remember when called on it further down the track. At the end of the day, I wouldn't want to insult someone else's intelligence by concocting some cock and bull story, and then expecting them to believe it.

It's demeaning to them, and it says a lot about a person who feels the need to justify themselves and their actions through lies and deceit. If you are truly honest about yourself and free in your life, you don't need to justify yourself... FULL STOP.

People can either accept me for who I am, or go along their merry way. Frankly, I'm happy playing in my sandpit, with or without company. The same applies to my approach to working - you either choose to see me on equal ground, or keep walking.

So, the question remains: why should I be made to feel compelled to spin some fairy story to clients? Is what I do so shameful, or so deserving of embroidery? Despite what others may think, I like my life. I love my family. I have wickedly-sensational friends. I don't need to fabricate some elaborate fiction when people ask about my life. Most of the time, it's pretty damn spectacular on it's own... modifications unnecessary!

 

In a nutshell, I share whatever information with my clientele (or anyone else, for that matter) that seems appropriate. I deem such appropriateness to be reliant on variables such as the occasion and the individual. There's nothing worse than misjudging a situation or individual by waxing lyrical about your life story during a moment of 'bonding'... only to sweat bullets for months afterward, fearing repercussions of the highest order.

Ever been stuck at a reception table with distant relatives with whom you have nothing in common, silently cursing every future invite to another bloody wedding? I decided awhile ago that when I die, I'm going straight to heaven. Thanks to family weddings, I figure I've already done my time in hell. The only things worse are funerals and wakes...

 

Now, with that thought in mind, imagine how well it would go down if I suddenly decided to paralyze the painfully-trickling table talk with sordid industry anecdotes... somehow, I doubt anybody would benefit from such a revelation. Thankfully, I possess the cognitive awareness to discern what people or occasions require the disclosure of my unusual career.

 

As for blogging about my life, WELL...... that's a WHOOOOOLE other story! Suffice to say, though: if you don't like it, why read it? No one forces people to read the blogs of other people. In fact, it has become my opinion that there are those of us out there who do so just so they have a barrow to push, an axe to grind, a wall to wail at, blah blah blah. They NEED to feel outraged at something or somebody, because they are so inherently unhappy within themselves.

 

Take me as I am, or go elsewhere.

I have the right to hold and share my opinions, just as others have the right to refute them. You mightn't like me, and guess what? Chances are, I probably wouldn't like you either! Imagine how boring the world would be if we all looked, acted and thought the same way.

Anyone familiar with Aldous Huxley's Brave New World will recall the philosophy behind the Forde societal structure. Modern society is much the same. We function because we are a melting pot of culture, history, education and opinions. We are people from ALL stratas of society, from the alphas right through to the epsilons.

 

WE ALL MATTER!

 

The beautiful thing about a democracy is that we all have the right to be heard. What you choose to do with that information is strictly up to you. Don't you enjoy the freedom to make informed decision about your lives? Personally, I love having choices, and I like having the right to say yes and no. If I like something, I generally return for more. If I don't, I won't. The upshot is this: if you want to know about my life, I will tell you. If you don't, run along and play elsewhere.

No one is forcing you to read, listen, observe, or do anything you don't want to know. Don't like what I have to say? Then close the browser window. Read someone else's blog. Fuck your neighbour. Go disco dancing. Keep a beehive. Learn glass blowing. Buy a hot air balloon. Start a commune. Just GET HAPPY, DAMMIT!

 

At the end of the day, we are all just people. People need love, and love is what I sell...

 

Well, by the hour, anyway!